I remembered writing about "unconditional Love" in some essay that was aim at some contest, I think it was about mother;s day and I was supposed to write a 15 words slogan about my love for my mother.
But what does "unconditional Love" even mean?
I thought about it long and hard. Mother is not perfect but she is the best thing that I could ask for. I was not forsaken in terms of the basic need of a good education, a firm hand in independence and maybe a reality check about "real" life.
Maybe I am not pampered like my partner but we balance each other out. He have what I do not have. I am not bitter about people who have such accommodating parents. Parents who provide for them and continue to do so. My parents are frugal.
Very frugal indeed.
But they had to , in order to bring up five girls in such a harsh environment. Uncles , aunties and cousins was not very closed nor did they offer any comfort.
Still, we grew up with much love to offer and a hard head to work hard for our life.
"Unconditional Love" to me is about total acceptance. That one is different and no two person are alike. To adapt and to change myself , for the good of others. But never to judge how other live or to think for once, that I am any better than anyone. Or that I know better than my parents.
They are still respected, highly regarded and well positioned.
Their faults are minor because I can change. I will cope and I will continue to learn about my passage as a mother and as a better parent to my children.
My sisters and I both agree although mother should really just learn to appreciate us more often, we can not and will not expect her to change.
That would be too harsh for a lady of her prestige to accept.
That any of her girls whine that she is a nuisance. That would simply be heart broken and an eternal sin on our behalf.
I realized that and continue to explain to my partner.
It is not difficult but it had made me come to terms with how much I can do and what Love really means in a family.
How two families, of such different upbringing, can come together to achieve a momentum.
Heck, even reach equilibrium. A balance that both parties have such wonderful children to love, to teach, to play with and to embrace life.
My children are the key and the glue to this equation.
Although mother has doubts on how I cope with two, with no help, I assured her I am open minded and I am changing.
Right before my own eyes, my thinking and level of empathy, even the need and the urge to protect and love my children, has continually evolved and changed.
Maybe I will rewrite what is "Unconditional Love"....
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